I have had multiple conversations this week with people in which they tell me a terrible belief that they have about reality and I work to convince them that they chose that belief, and that they can choose a different belief. It has been interesting.
I thought what I should first focus on is what is the common problem. For some reason, we think that finding problems/issues/deficiencies will help us get better. Whenever someone is upset, our go to question is “what’s wrong?” We are programmed, through our culture and our language to focus on negatives. The simple example of this is if you take a test and you get 99 questions correct out of 100, what do you focus on? The FACT that you were right 99% of the time, or the FACT that you were wrong 1% of the time?
By constantly focusing on “what’s wrong” we are going to constantly find what is wrong. That sounds like the stupidest sentence I have ever written, and yet I also think it is one of the most profound if you can understand what that can mean to you. The most important word in that sentence is “focusing.”
You can choose what you focus on. You find what you look for. You see what is in your reality. You notice the things that you are consciously thinking about. So if you are constantly focused on what is wrong, guess what you are constantly going to find. Who chooses what you focus on? You? Your parents? Your religion? Your society? Your friends? Your books? Your tv or movies? Really take some time and think about that question. What if your world view is something that you created when you were 12, or 8, and you are still stuck in it? How many 8 year olds would you take advice from?
I am grateful for Amber listening to me.
I am grateful for Nora listening to me.
I am grateful for Hailey listening to me.
I am grateful for bubble baths.
I am grateful for philosophers.
I am grateful for good questions.
I am grateful for seeing past the defenses.
I am grateful for trust.
I am grateful for time.
I am grateful for deep breaths.
I am grateful for every day that I get.
I love my life! Thank you!