October 24th, 2016

I got Amber back for the weekend and that made me very happy.  It is amazing how much of a difference there is just in having someone here to help me.  Both Nora and Hailey have been sick, so they are not in the best mood.  And I fully admit that taking care of both of them is incredibly draining.  Even with Amber here over the weekend, I was tired.

We were able to get out for some errands, and we made it to Freyja and Aurora’s birthday party on Saturday. We found a new park as well: Walker Johnston. It is a great park!  Sunday we made our normal outing to the Diner with my parents.  And I was able to go for a walk outside with Nora as well. We stayed in at night because everyone was pretty drained at that point.  All in all, a tired, and great weekend.

I am still thinking about judgement and understanding. Nora has been incredibly difficult at bedtime for about the last week.  And last night she was refusing to put her pajamas on, so I yanked her up pretty hard and I know that I hurt her.  I do not understand what is making her act so mean and only at bedtime.  I do not understand why it makes me so angry, especially when I know that she is going to do it, and we are going to get through it.  So I am working on analyzing my feelings about it and asking her questions. The thing is that she doesn’t seem to know what is making her do it either. When we talk, she seems to fully understand that she is being mean, that it is her choice, and that she has negative consequences for it.  When those consequences are in full effect, she is definitely not happy about it.  The conversation and search for understanding continues.

 

I am grateful for Amber.

I am grateful for Nora.

I am grateful for Hailey.

I am grateful for still being able to get outside without freezing.

I am grateful for an amazing life. I love my life! Thank you!

~Ryan Lynch