Yesterday I took Nora out for her very first time going ice skating. It was incredibly fun and I took away some valuable lessons from it.
At first I wanted to coach her and push her and just keep talking. Nora was kind to listen. I could tell she was nervous and scared of falling. By the time we got around lap one, I could also see that she was already getting better. I changed my tactics and I just stopped talking. I never coached Nora or Hailey how to walk. I let them keep trying and they both figured it out. By lap three Nora was figuring it out. By lap five she was moving faster than me, so I sped up. Eventually she let go of me. I am so proud of her.
I need to step back sometimes and just let people figure it out. I love coaching, I love teaching, I love helping. Sometimes the biggest help is to just let them go, fail, and keep going. Nora would occasionally ask me to stay in one spot so that she could go ahead for herself. I was so happy to watch her. Allowing her to go at her own speed meant that I didn’t push her to let go of me. It meant that she went until she felt comfortable, and then asked to let go of me. It meant that she went faster at her own pace. It meant that she learned what worked for her.
The other thing that I put into place, was I made us leave before she wanted to. She loved ice skating. By leaving when she was still excited about it, she was instantly talking about when can we go back. By leaving on a high note, she has positive emotion reinforcing that she tried something and she loved it. There is a part of me that would have wanted to stay, keep coaching, and push her further and further. When we left with her and me both wanting more, then we are excited to get back out there. We are excited to come back for more. We are excited to do something together.
I am grateful for the Drake Diner.
I am grateful for Akibono.
I am grateful for dinner with Amber.
I am grateful for a trip to the bookstore being exciting.
I am grateful for Hailey sleeping on me.
I am grateful for Amber being my perfect match.
I am grateful for reading.
I am grateful for being a badass.
I am grateful for Amber being more like me.
I am grateful for me being more like Amber.
I am grateful for Nora’s smile.
I love my life! Thank you!