For Jay

Amber and I just got back from a trip to Seattle and Portland. It was pretty sweet. She applied to the Udub and Portland State, so we were visiting school, friends, and family. It was a great time, both cities are so amazing. And the city of books blew me away. (You know what I’m talking about Portland.) 😉

Our last night there we stayed at Jay and Kelly’s place. The girls were wiped from the night before in Portland, so Jay and I saw Hannibal. Not exactly what I was expecting, but enjoyable nonetheless. Afterwards, we grabbed some beers and went down to the beach and argued. I love arguing with Jay because I think that he and I think the same ways about so many things. The difference comes in because he is strongly a concrete thinker and I am just as strongly abstract. It makes it hard to hear each other when you don’t understand each other’s language.

We had a very interesting conversation though. I believe his goal was for me to explain the way I think about something. He wanted me to expand his view on the subject of my choosing. I think the problem came when my answer was that I can’t do that. (I assume you would agree.) What I told him was that there are infinite possibilities for what will happen next. I have the choice to pick or follow any of them. Who I am is the accumulation of billions and billions of choices. Absolutely no one has experienced things in the way that I have experienced them. And I have never experienced things in the exact same way as anyone.

So who is to say that one way of experiencing anything is the “better” way?

What makes your experience have any more value than mine?

I think Jay took that to mean that I feel that I can do whatever I want and say whatever I want at any time and not care about anyone else’s opinion. And it does. I can do that if I so choose to. That is simply my system. If A is better than B to me, I’m going to go with A even if 80% of the world thinks I am wrong.

I don’t think that Jay saw that the system does not describe application. It is better in my opinion to be within a society than without. In order to exist in a society I have to follow societal norms. Even if I disagree with society, I follow its rules because the value of being in a society is more important to me than the value of proving to others that I am right.

That law could be put into so many situations. Anytime that I have done something that is not in MY best interest, it is because the value of making someone else happy is often more important to me than, to me, what just seems like being lazy or inconsiderate. (long sentence, nice)

I hope that I fulfilled Jay’s request. I felt I could have. : )